<![CDATA[Stillwater]]>https://deshame.mehttps://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!s2DW!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3e7368c2-46b7-4b32-98ff-d19f3ffb60c5_512x512.pngStillwaterhttps://deshame.meSubstackSat, 09 May 2026 12:51:12 GMT<![CDATA[AI Coaching for BPD, HPD, NPD, ASPD, & More]]>https://deshame.me/p/coachinghttps://deshame.me/p/coachingSun, 30 Mar 2025 10:23:50 GMTAI-Based Coaching

Mentalization is your ability to consider hypotheses and gradually figure out what you or another person might be feeling, thinking, or desiring, and to flexibly change your mind as you learn more.

You’re probably already good at this most of the time, but you may not be aware of some systematic limitations or you might run into complete shutdowns of your ability to mentalize in stressful situations.

Our AI provides:

  • General mentalization training

  • Mentalization practice for stressful situations

  • Challenging (as softly or firmly as you like) of biases in your mentalization

Human Coaching

I’m the resident human coach! I love supporting people with (what the DSM calls) cluster B personality disorders – BPD, HPD, NPD, ASPD, and combinations.

BPD, HPD, NPD, ASPD, & Combos

I can help you if:

  • You have any of these personality disorders or traits of them and don’t often get to chitchat about it openly

  • You want someone to listen with unconditional positive regard to whatever naughty things you’ve done – but I won’t help you hide from the police

  • You want someone to challenge your bullshit – but kindly with cautious inquiries

  • Your memory is a bit fragmented and you want someone to bridge the gaps

  • You want help sleuthing out who you are

  • You’re struggling or in collapse and need someone to hold your hand – be it virtually

  • You want someone to talk to who can keep up intellectually – over 99% likely if you were a random draw

  • You want to play me with your impeccable lies – done deal so long as you pay

  • You want to gush or complain about the AI – I’m also the dev

But:

  • I’m not a therapist, though I can hopefully help you find one

The first session is free, after that I charge $80, but there are still early bird discounts going around. I’ll refund one session if you’re unhappy and want to quit.

Other Stuff

  • I’ve been active in the effective altruism community since 2014 and in the nonprofit space since 2010

  • I have an MSc in computer science and have been software dev since 2010

  • I’ve cofounded a charity and a startup

  • I’m poly, trans, and probably AuDHD

  • I also know some things about AvPD, DPD, and OCPD

So feel free to pick my brains on those things too!

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